Thursday, September 25


It's not the best timing, nor the worst..but it's certainly not my favourite time of the month.

The surgeon has to be away, so the scheduled surgery is postponed. I'd have to wait for another month. Choosing to continue under another surgeon who can only conduct an open surgery instead of lacroscopy, means risking more infection and a longer recovery period. I'd rather wait.
The 'dreaded stomach cramps and sanitary napkins' days are back, which means no more fasting for the rest of Ramadhan. Going to the clinic means being given another supply of medicine and painkillers. If not for my strong mental strength and faith, I think I'd be in a worse state than I am now.

I'm trying to stay calm although it's not easy. Allah SWT knows best.
Mum's been saying that I should have had the surgery early this month instead of opting to wait till after Eidilfitri. She doesn't understand my reasons. I choose not to answer her. Allah SWT knows best.
All plans have to be rescheduled yet again.
I'm praying hard that Hubby wont be called outstation on that particular day. I don't think I can take it if I'm to go to the hospital on my own for the surgery.

Well, at least some people will be glad.. My students will have their teacher till end of October. My colleagues too, will be glad they won't have to take turns to replace me in my classes, huhuhuu..

Really, I'm not emotionally and physically prepared for this postponement. All there is to do now is to wait and pray for the best.
I'm telling myself - Allah knows best..Allah knows best.. Allah knows best..
It's qadaq and qadar..

image: reuters


  1. Assalamualaikum, kak Aliya.
    I have been a silent reader of your blog for the past few months.

    I hope you're doing all right. May Allah give you strength to hold on.

    When Allah tests us with hardship, He wants us to hold on tighter, He wants us to be closer to Him, He wants us to pray for his blessings.
    Allahu a'lam.

    I pray to Allah, for His blessings and love to such a lovable person like you. May Allah bless you, always.

    "Hasbunallahu wani'mal wakeel"
    (Strength is with none but Allah and Allah is our best and only protector)


  2. Ujian diberi mengikut tahap keimanan. Didahului oleh para nabi dan diikuti oleh mereka yang sering diuji.

    Senyumlah kak.. You will be fine, i am sure you will. When it's all done, you'll look back and say 'I've gone through that, and I'm so grateful.'

    And i will pray for you too.

  3. Assalamualaikum Aliya,

    Betul kata Humyrah, ujian diberi mengikut tahap keimanan. Saya percaya ada hikmah semua ini.
    Allah tidak akan membebani seseorang melainkan yang termampu olehnya (terjemahan dari penghujung Surah al-Baqarah).

    Saya akan turut mendoakan kesihatan dan kesejahteraan Aliya menghadapi ujian ini.

  4. Waalaikumussalam warahmatullah,
    Thanks for your prayers, everyone. I'm coping well, although with painkiller (hate to but no choice la). On the level of 1-10, the pain is between 7-8. And I've made the decision not to let it interfere too much with my life.
    Allah swt had blessed me with plenty of blessings. The sickness is temporary (insyaAllah)as part of my test. Part of my husband's. Perhaps to lessen the burden of my sins, wallah'ulam.
    Now when I feel low, I prefer to keep quiet and dzikir. Or keep myself busy if not too tired. Alhamdulillah this sickness is teaching me another level of patience.
    So despite the pain etc, today I chose to go Raya shopping with husband instead of feeling sorry for myself and letting negative thoughts conquer me. Dragged myself home after an hour and RM300 poorer.. Too tired to write long tonight. Continue later.