Thursday, December 16


Sometimes I bit more than I could chew, hehehe... and make some people scowl in return.
They'd think I'm being offensive/rude/unrespectable.
But then, if I dont voice out, who else would?
Most will take the safe path and remain silent.

Being a Muslimah is not an idle pastime.
It is a responsibility.
It is a fulltime job in which we will be paid for in hereafter.

So tell me, what would you do if:
1. You see photos of a bride putting on her makeup, with her hair exposed before she put on her bridal gown [she wears her hijab], in a social website, posted there by her photographer friend?
Would you admire the lovely photo or would you feel uneasy?
Would you keep quiet and say,"Ahh, not my business, I don't even know who she is" or
would you do something to help her protect her dignity?

2.You receive emails forwarded by nonMuslim friends and you open them.
There are jokes about Muslims/Islam in general which you find offensive and inaccurate like this one
and this. Would you quietly delete them and hope you won't receive them anymore? Or would you risk spoiling your good friendships with the senders by replying and stating your opinions about the offensive materials?

3. You are in a group of colleagues and they're complaining about your immediate boss. While everyone else is nodding their heads in agreement, you don't feel comfortable listening to their comments. Would you add oil to the fire or keep quiet? Or would you try to defend your boss and make everyone else angry? Or would you choose other options?

4. Malay and Chinese cultural differences may often cause people to misunderstand you and your actions. The Malay saying,'don't hurt the feelings of others' [jangan sampai mengguris hati orang lain] often make you hesitate to do what is religiously right and put aside cultural sentiments and biased views. Children are told not to offend their parents although the elders may be misguided and ignorant. Wives are expected to be demure and agreeable. Being quiet may be regarded as aloof and proud, being vocal as rude and confrontational. Not beginning a statement with "Sorry but.." is accused of being arrogant.
You feel stifled by so many cultural and community expectations but to maintain peace and harmony, yet to follow Muhammad's teachings, what would you do?

Anyway, in my opinion what matters most is that Allah swt looks upon you favourably.
We are accountable for our actions before God. 
I am not perfect myself, but then I don't go around apologising for every word I utter for fear that I may offend someone unintentionally[heck, if you feel offended come tell it to my face and I'd respect you for that]. That's just not me.
I think well of others although I may not agree with everything they do, huhu.,
I don't say "I'm sorry" to every Ali, ABeng and Muthu [or to every Minah, AMei and Devi] when I have done nothing wrong , but I'd do that before Allah because that's in the Quran.
We can't please everyone but it is of utmost importance to please the Al Mighty.
And as a Muslim, we have to prove that what we do is accordance to the teachings of Islam and prophet Mohammad [pbuh] and not the other way around. Certainly not because everyone else in the community is doing it that way, for theirs may not be correct or accurate to the syariah.


  1. yup..finally,terkeluar juga. certainly those are hiccups in surrounding (at least in semenanjung.made me a bitter man,surely

  2. i like this,
    "We can't please everyone but it is of utmost importance to please the Al Mighty."

  3. Assalam Alaikum Sis Aliya,

    I have this kind of challenges too~ Usually, I keep quiet because I do not have the courage to speak up for the truth... and also, with my limited knowledge, I'm afraid if what I said is the right thing...

    But I know one day, I will have to speak the truth because at the end of the day, it's Allah(SWT) I've to be accounted to...

    InsyahAllah, when opportunities arise, I'll speak the truth and then make duaa to Allah(SWT) that He will put peace in that person...

    May Allah(SWT) gives us the courage to be a strong muslimah! =)

    Khadijah C.

  4. Subhanallah! Thank you for such post!

  5. 1 . i will surely felt uneasy for her , and pray that in the near future she might realize what shes done wrong in the past.if shes a close friend i might give hints, or speak my opinion generally , so that she dont felt at least being targeted specifically by my remarks.

    thirsty people drink the water u offer to them if they are indeed of thirst, but may reject the offer if they dont.thats human nature.

    2. they are ignorant. same as taif people that throw stones at our prophet saw during his era.
    as long as they do no have bad intentions , leave them be (my opinion)

    3. everything happend for a reason. for me i will be fair n states my opinion,pro n cons and then keep quiet or leave or might anger them all if what they said is untrue.

    4. Muhammad's way in dealing with people are the best :)

  6. membina insan cemerlang' DR HM Tuah

    malay mind hiccups,or aint they just hardwired wrongly?ppl want peace,not headache

  7. Salam,

    Hi Sis,
    I was very busy lately. Baby otw. :D

    By the way, about this article, its actually a very good one. To answer this questions require lots of knowledge and thinking.

    Usually I just will spill it out (say it right in the face but in the good manner) and sometimes I will keep quite and advise them later. I dont really care what people will say cause I only care what Allah SWT will think of my actions.

    Wrong is wrong and we need to point it out or people will think of it as a norm in Islam (like not covering hair in wedding pics). We should voice it out one way or the other, but how I think it basically depends on condition.

  8. Waalaikumussalam everyone,
    Thanks for your comments, keep them coming :)
    What would I do? Well, to be frank, here's what I actually did, hehehe

    1) I wrote a quick message to the photographer- I do not know the bride- and advised him to take away the revealing photo from the FB album, giving my reasons. Alhamdulillah he understands and now THAT photo is no longer available for all to see :D

    2)I wrote to the senders and pointed out the errors in the claims. Sure,some were angry as I forwarded my replies to everyone in the email lists, hehehe.. That stops them from sending me such nonsense again but I still get a few from others once in a blue moon.. and yes, those include a few Muslims who mock other religions :I

    3)Usually I'd excuse myself from the group to go to the loo, hahaha.. unless I have proof that their statements are wrong. Office politics can be so ugly, so I try not to get involved :)

    4)Pray that things & relationships would be better soon :)

    May Allah swt bless and guide us all on the right path, ameen

  9. Waalaikumussalam
    dukun melayu~ forgive them for they do not know what they are doing.. yes, I want peace of mind too :)
    aimirokis ~ :)
    khadijah ~ ameen
    Rei ~ yes, agree
    ahong ~ Congratulations, soon to be a father :)