Saturday, May 29

NEW TITLE, NEW RESPONSIBILITIES, NEW BEGINNINGS

I'm writing from my friend's house. She's the co-wife of an ustaz whom I mentioned in a previous post. Alhamdulillah, life's been good here since baby and I arrived. And indeed, it's a really harmonious family although both the wives are staying in the same house with the children. So baby Ikram has the attention of three loving mothers and four children. :)
It's been a great joy watching my baby grow although breastfeeding and night nursing are rather tiring. The nurse came over today for house visits and was surprised to see me greeting her at the door.
"Gosh, you don't look like a woman in confinement! So active!" she declared. [just how does a woman in confinement is supposed to look anyway?]
Alhamdulillah for Allah's blessings. I feel really fine although am keeping a constant watch on my blood pressure. The doctor has stopped my medication and asked the nurse to daily a daily reading on home visits for 2 weeks. Other than a slight discomfort when I lie on my back or lie sideways, I'm active, more than during my last month of pregnancy. I'm really really grateful for the strength and health He's given me.
Yes, I've been active since the 2nd day at the hospital when I was left to take care of baby Ikram in the hospital. the hospital practices rooming-in and all mothers have to breatsfeed and take care of baby on their own at the hospital. I managed it although it was 4am when I slept, hehehe.
Today is the 6th day since I delivered Ikram and both of us are doing fine, although Ikram is having a light jaundice. We'd be going to the clinic for his reading tomorrow and I really hope that he'd be ok soon.
Being a mother at the great age of 39 means that I've more life experiences than younger mothers. I may not be as strong or as active as younger mothers but insyaAllah that can be compensated with more patience and knowledge.
Both husband and I have a vision for our child which may surprise many. Let that vision be a secret for now but insyaAllah, we pray that it will be a reality in the future, when he grows up. Somebody who is a better Muslim than his parents and does more for Islamic dakwah, insyaAllah. and to achieve that vision, it'd have to start from day 1 when he's born. Alhamdulillah, Ikram seems to show a great potential :)
He's currently learning to be patient and hardworking, hahaa..
And as for me, well... I'd have to be a better Muslimah too, in order to guide him. Lead by example. Show and guide, not just preach and teach. Ikram is going to be a multi-linguist, insyaAllah. Husband has already reminded me to learn how the great Islamic scholars are brought up. I'm planning to combine that with the good qualities of both Chinese and Malay upbringing.

My luck seems to change for the better. I've just got news of my transfer to a school nearer to home. So I'd be teaching in a new environment right after my confinement leave [sometime in July]. My current batch of students are going to be disappointed with the news but it'd be a relief for me, as I'd no longer have to battle the early morning traffic to rush to the school 45 minutes away from home. Besides that, I still have to return to the hospital for checkups on the anterior fibroid which is still in my uterus. Hopefully it'd shrink to nothing so that Ikram can have a brother or sister, insyaAllah. So getting the transfer is really a blessing.

Also today I did something which I had postponed doing for a few years.
Followers of this blog might notice that I seldom mentioned my father. Yes, he's still alive but separated from my mother and brother. And because he was so angry that I refused to listen and remained married to my ex, he hadn't spoken a word to me since my divorce in 2006. He even said on the phone that he'd disown me if I insisted on the divorce. Even when I went home after my divorce and still a nonMuslim, he refused to speak to me. I chose to be silent because I didn't want to risk being beaten for saying the wrong words.

Yet Islam instructs us to be respectful to our elders, even when they are no longer of the same faith as us Muslims. I've been contemplating this issue for some time, especially as there've been a lot of friction in the family since I left home after reversion to Islam. My mum finally did something for herself which she had postponed doing for a long time.

This morning, based on my instinct, I phoned my grandmother whom I haven't met for 3 years [yes, she's alive and is 88 years old] to tell her the good news of her great-grandson's birth. I had postponed the meeting because I know her very well, and want the first meeting after my conversion to Islam, to be a happy occasion, not to get her naggings and disapproval, huhu. And gosh, the grand old lady can really nag! Of course, I called her once in a while, and she has also spoken to my husband on the phone. But my pregnancy and delivery was a big secret.
So Ikram's birth is going to be turning-point especially as he's her only great-grandson after 2 great-granddaughters [Chinese prefers sons].
And my father spoke to me on phone too. Actually, it was me doing the talking and he was going "ohh.. ahhh... ok.." I must have caught him by surprise, the news of the birth, the phone call, etc.
My father is a proud man, who likes to make jokes about the Muslims rituals and beliefs although he has many Malay friends and associates. So it was a blow to him when I reverted to Islam and 'dishonours' the family [in other words, him].
Grandma congratulated me and reminded me to bring husband and baby for her to see after my confinement.
And as Mum and brother are now not on speaking terms to her and my father, guess it's going to have to be a pre-condtioned meeting [no talking about the other party, huhu].
Well, looks like I'd have to add another entry into my post-confinement calender :)

10 comments:

  1. Salam kak. After reading all that, I simply want to wish you all the best in everything kak. Be it about baby Ikram, your transfer, your parents and even your grandma. I hope Allah will always guide you in whatever mission you'd do for your life.

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  2. may Allah bless you always ;))

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  3. u know..as i been following ur blog for a while now..for the first time i actually well up on the part that you called ur grandmother and dad..

    i dont know why..but i guess we are only human..i m not someone who is afraid to show his emotion...i hug (within boundaries) when i need one, i cried to show that i m sad with something (but often in secrecy and usually on the prayer mat)

    well i hope things goes well for you - Insya Allah :)

    Take care Kak!

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  4. salam che gu
    Hope baby Ikram will bring u wonders...
    including unifying the 3 generations together once again...

    InsyaAllah, hipertensi itu juga akan berlalu
    (spt yg biasa berlaku dgn "hipertensi cetusan kehamilan @ PIH = pregnancy induced hypertension).

    Hope the fibroids wont give u much trouble too, which should usually become smaller after the delivery. At any case, u can trust what modern medical management can offer u, InsyaAllah...

    Mestilah cayaaang...tapi jangan pula manja2kan sangat si comel tu...
    heheheh
    maklumlah anak tunggal pulak tu...
    maaf,,,bergurau aje
    wassalam
    nas

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  5. salam kak aliya,

    good to know that you are getting one great news after another, congrats on the baby boy ;) hope everything went well with the rest of the family.

    may Allah bless you, and take care!!

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  6. well, if u read my entire blog / posts, i never mention about my father too. it's a long story. anyway, this post has many good news, and i am so happy to hear it. ikram is going to meet his grandfather!! :)

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  7. Waalaikumussalam kakchik,fatihah, edz lee,knitfreak-to-be, Humyrah,
    Well, I surprised even myself by taking the first step in calling Grandma after all this time. Yes, Ikram's birth is timely.

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  8. Waalaikumussalam nas,
    I'm diagnosed as patient with Essential Hypertension, not PIH [sigh!]. just been given a different type of medicine after delivery to control my B/P, and the nurse who does daily house visits is more worried about my health than yours truly :P
    insyaAllah, I'm hoping for another child too [although my mom is saying 'enough la,one is already so difficult!].

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  9. Waalaikumussalam Ummu Auni Afif,
    Alhamdulillah Ikram is growing by the day and is a pleasure to behold. He's small, only 51 cm in length but very strong and can already lift up his head and look sideways on the 4th day, scaring his Ummi half to death by his sudden action.
    I was worried about him getting jaundice as I often ate out during pregnancy but alhamdulillah he was free of it until the 5th day, whereby he's diagnosed with a low reading of 167[normal 150].Today he looks better and is more active. Thank goodness for HPA products :D

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